FEB 11

This flying thing, it's quite a mishmash of observances and experiences with feelings; fear joy curiousity, that come in waves with it. But first, what is it about black clothing in airports on all the women? Gosh I felt so out of place with a purple skirt and tights on. I mean black pants, black boots, black coats, black black black. What about that? Another nonsense subject for another day.

Flying up into the darkness, out of NJ, with Manhattan exposed beautifully below me. The skyline the Hudson all manner of bridges. But it was the Light that cornered my attention. Lights of the city in every hew, stark dark swath of Central Park running up the middle, bright red glow atop the Empire State. How many people have lived thier lives these past few centuries in this small space? How many spirits huddled amidst the Light? Simply, the nighttime visual was absolutely engaging, lifting my sad thoughtful spirit upwards.

In Frankfurt an Iranian Islamic Republic jet sitting on the runway. You don't see those in the US! Then the biggest double-decker Luthfansa jet I have ever seen! Made the other jets look like prop planes.
From there flying over Germany, Yugaslovia, Bulgeria, Turkey with amazing snowcapped peaks far in the distance. A slice of the Mediteranean before darkness descends. Onwards, grazing airspace of Jordon, Israel, Irag and finally over Saudi Arabia.....the captain announcing to show boarding passes before debarking warning about no alcohol allowed no nude pictures allowed and the penalty. Not that I carry alcohol and nude pictures around with me but still.....And finally the Kingdom of Bahrain, surrounded by water, Saudi, Iran, UAE, and Kuwait. For a blessed few of us, our destination for the week.
Through this 18 hours my thoughts drifted many places but often towards the Egyptian people and what was happening. Who had possible died or been injured that day in the name of freedom?

Outakes HNL to NYC

Flying out of Honolulu looking down on a firework dislpay going off near Waikiki. Of course. Chinese new year, rabbits galore. The meaning of that 'possibly' to be read later. Sitting next to a polite young man the spitting image of Ryan Gosling, having been told that before he still asked who is that? I sigh. Giving me renewed faith in the young generation with his attitude, his job, his trustfulness........or maybe I imagined all that. The supershuttle guy into NYC totally entertaining loose with information, his life included. The passengers from Toronto, Japan, and some other place all newcomers to the City. I felt like an old timer to NYC and that is funny. Being reminded I've lived here before in some other body. The knowing of that is weird strange and not worth dwelliing on, just that inner consciousness that is......going into Lincoln Tunnel with a monstrous billboard of Beatles over it. Surreal the Beatles in such a place 'now available on Itunes'. Snow piled in drifts still imprisoning cars dirty snow white as sheets snow cold beautiful city.

Taking off.....

The biggest storm in decades reaching from New Mexico to the east coast, Egypt erupting in civil unrest, the world made so much smaller by the media that greets me this morning. What am I thinking flying out into the melee that is our earth? In all honesty this weather storm will pass before I board a plane in 56 hours....Not sure about the rest of it. So easy to be touched by the events and human beings half a world away, in this age of instant camera pictures flashing before our eyes, the news media racing to tell you what is happening, who is dying, who is wrong or right. Although true journalism is , just the facts mam, depends on the  integrity of the journalist and the corporation owning the media feed that literally feeds us...............I want to know I want to be informed I don't want to pull the covers over my head and not know not hear not feel. But, really why? My powerlessness in the face of knowledge and facts...........and then the other real question,  what is real and what is bullshit?........
So, enough of the proselytizing, is that what I'm doing (gotta look that up) and tell you my facts.
I'm getting on a plane Friday, heading to NYC, and from there to the Middle East. Not Egypt, but close enough. The land of camels and deserts, and goats, and history.....'our' history since most of us came out of that area eons ago. The land of Mohammad and Jesus and Abraham and Rumi all the parables and books written of these peoples, these hearts and spirits who are a part of us......oops there I go again. Anyway will try to write while there, plans could change, plane flights are the epitome of letting go......and take you along my amazing journey seen through my eyes wide open engaged.......or possibly totally freaked out.

Redwoods

Where Life Begins





Packing

What a process and mindf%*k packing is. Always take items i don't need, but find that out by unpacking; never while packing. Who knows the mood I'll be in to wear that certain item of clothing, that I rarely wear when home anyway. And shampoo, lotions, face creams...how much of that stuff do I want or need? Hell, I'll barely have time sometimes to get where I want to go and plan on sleeping alone the whole damn time so who cares if my hair smells nice (I do!). And, of course the chargers for phone, camera, toohbrush (yes, I have one of those cool sonic-care ones and swear by it)computer, and then adaptors for all this shit too.......Not to mention the few food items I manage to stash in my suitcase; prunes, chocolate (good chocolate!), almond butter for those places where protien-craving will be screaming at my insides, where soy may be non-existent amid the lamb/chicken/goat/whatever choices I can't stomach. Ok, I sound like such a prude but really my stomach has a mind of its own, and although I may try everything once, kims stomach needs its familiar hawaii-fruits-vegs-avacado-wheatless cracker menu. But I do hear there's great yogurt in the middle east so that's plus.......And reading material. Oh my, thats the worst. No, I haven't bought a kindle (was actually hoping for one for christmas, mom) but they are appealing. Most books I'd want to read, even daily meditaion(like I read THAT every day when traveling) could be held on this cool little handheld thingie (oh, another charger in the suitcase)...but I don't have one so what do I pick to read while waiting for 12 planes. Yes, twelve flights in the next 6 weeks....I'm melting down now and really need to pack instead of write gibberish about it. Wish me luck....

Ocean Energy

She walked down the hill to the beach.
The only people there a Japanese couple
who asked her to take their picture.
So funny so typical.
She took off her overalls and shirt,
naked underneath and waded in.
The water surprisingly warm welcomed her.......
how to explain the energy change that took place
as she swam into the deep.
It is like a metamorphosis of consciousness,
happiness and peace infusing her body spirit and mind.
As the rain fell on her she lifted her arms in supplication,
gratitude, grief, and joy all rolled together
bringing tears to her eyes.

Sitting in the sand she gazed out at the ocean.
The cloudy skies opened far out on the sea, a sunlit patch of water,
the sun’s rays painting the water, light sparkling blinding shimmers.
She gazed in awe at the visual beauty,
and as she did it changed, molded, and opened her heart with clarity of spirit.
Mesmerizing.
How to hold that moment,
put it in her pocket to pull out whenever she needed
a reminder of what's real.
The only place that can hold it, is her heart.
And the only way to be constantly reminded
is to keep her heart open.
Otherwise
it is gone.

Facebook-Check Up Check In Check Out

What is facebook anyway? A place to see who is bold enough to let you see them, to post things we care about or could care less about? A site to let people in, when offline we may not share anything one-on-one with a real live person that day. A place to see useless information mixed with insightful tidbits, quotes, phrases that brighten your day, make you think, give you hope. A forum to see people you miss, care about, may not think about unless you see thier picture in that column. A sad place for following those you cannot touch, don't want to touch......delete. It's a place to check up, check in, check out. Safe from actually calling someone and asking how they are.............you get to see who died, who is suffering, who is full of themselves, pictures from all over the world, a mishmash of information on parade.....I have mixed feelings about this place where others may hide out, may sneak, may judge, make comments, make no comments, remember birthdays. Where you get happy birthdays from people that never knew your birthday, much less congradulate you. It opens our world, makes it smaller..but we still show only what we want to show; unless someone posts pictures of you that definitely need to be deleted. It is a forum to love, and manipulate, to reach out (my favorite reason to share), to say "Hi" I'm here I'm alive I'm alone I'm happy I'm sad....I I I........but through all those judgements of facebook, when I see someone validate me with love, a comment, sweet words of encouragement; there is some magic, a mystical quality to this worldwide fellowship of human friends watching for me, hopefully thinking kind thoughts.........as I do for them. Otherwise............delete.